Thinking today of Becky and what she and her family are
going through. I just can’t believe this has happened and sending love and
light her way. http://fortheloveofbabyliam.blogspot.com/2012/04/evelynn-augusta-rasmussen.html
Today we are at 37 weeks or full-term as our doctor told us
this past Friday. The past week was filled with three doctor appointments, the
end of working (woo hoo!) and trying to get some things done with my parents
who are moving-in with my sister permanently.
I’ll start with our appointments. We had an ultrasound on
Monday that found our LO estimating to be approximately 6 pounds, 6 ounces. This was the
best news to hear because I suspect this is the time in my pregnancy with Leia
that things started to deteriorate and I had no clue. So to see significant
weight gain in our LO was very good news to my ears. The doctor who looked over
the results from our ultrasound looked to be about 12 years old when she
entered the room but she did give us some good news telling us we had a score of
8 out of 8. All was well that day. Then this past Friday I went in for a
routine non-stress test followed by a regular appointment with our specialist.
Of course, the non-stress proved to be just the opposite of its name. The nurse
said our NST looked good but that she would show it to the doctor. The doctor
who read the NST results wanted me to have an ultrasound done to check the
amniotic fluid. This had my hubs and I stressing out for a little bit. We quickly
went from a routine NST appointment to thinking maybe this was it. Would we be
admitted to the hospital? Would all be okay? I kept saying to the nurse that
this was the reason for all these extra NST’s, etc., so if they found something
going wrong it could be monitored. It could be helped. So for about ten minutes
we thought it was going to be the day. Thankfully they found the amniotic fluid
was okay. It really hit home with both of us that this is getting real and that
any day now could be THE day. So
after we left the NST we went to see our specialist who also did a test to make
sure my water had not broken and that I was not leaking amniotic fluid. All was
well on that front, thankfully. He was very pleased with our ultrasound results and
told us the next weight we would have of our LO would be on the scale. PLEASE let that be the case. Let us bring home a LIVING BABY that we can love
in-person and not just in memory and from the one day we met Leia. I was pretty
emotional at this appointment. Crying when the nurse brought us in to the
exam room and her making a comment that brought back so many difficult memories
from my pregnancy with Leia. I then cried when the doctor left because as I
stated earlier, we are full-term and his instructions to us at this point were
that if we suspected anything or had concerns that we need to go to L&D or
if during business hours to page his nurse. It really is getting close.
My hubs
told me on Friday that it was really becoming real to him. He told me we needed
to get out some of the baby books that we had gotten when we were expecting Leia.
I have to admit I was kind of happy to hear him say this because it has been
pretty real for me the past 37 weeks and I realize that our LO will be here
soon. But I also realize that I have to remain calm and also realize that there
are some things I will need to let go. I can’t be obsessing about what hasn’t
been done but to also just learn to be happy and enjoy our LO once he/she is
here. To soak it in and bond with our LO. Let everything else go! Easier said
than done but I am going to try.
My last week of working was this past Friday. For the past
three weeks I have been part-time and that has been nice. It is a good feeling
to know that I won’t be going in daily and have the added responsibility of
work. I will miss the two coworkers that I have come to know fondly and worked
with in recent months. It is a small office and at the very end the attorney
that I work for had his wife take us all out for a lunch and they surprised me
with some baby gifts. It was really nice of them to do this for us and while I was
okay that day it was pretty upsetting to me at the end of the day. I’ve had a
couple other friends offer to do a baby shower and I’ve declined. I've told them
they could wait till our LO was here. We’ve also discussed doing a sip and see type
party that I have learned about from other BLM’s. I just don’t want to have
events that we did the same way when expecting Leia. My hubs even wanted to do
a getaway but since we did something like that when we were expecting with Leia
I just didn’t want to do it. I told him I’d rather we do something later in the
summer or fall when we can take LO with us and get away to the beach or
mountains. It just all has to feel and be different this time, so that I can cope.
Update on my Dad who had a stroke a few weeks back. He is
recovering well and with this happening both he and my mom have agreed to move
in permanently with my sister. She has the perfect set-up for being able to
have them live on the first floor of her home and she has offered to do this. I
worry that it will be too much for her and her husband, but she is taking it
on. This will probably be a transition to what eventually turns into assisted
living or a nursing home setting for them down the road or in a few years. I do
feel more at ease knowing they will be around others more often and not alone
at their home. I am handing all their financial matters which I have found to
be very time consuming but now with work done I can devote a little more time
to getting things more organized. Once things are in place it will not be too
much other than reviewing bills and paying them. It is the one thing I can do and help my sister with since
she will be caring full-time for them in her home. It really is hard to see your parents getting older and
becoming more dependent on others. They are stubborn and don’t want to be a
burden to anyone but it has also come to a point where they need daily
assistance and cannot do it on their own anymore. I love my family and would do
anything in the world for them and I hope they know this.
